🗺Choose your own adventure: Partnership Edition

The Value of Reruns

Sometimes the best content is worth watching again.

Instead of adding something new to your already-packed vacation reading list, I'm pointing you back to the most helpful content. Below I’ve laid out a few former writings and matched them to some personas. Depending on the one (or several) that speaks to you most right now, click, read and execute as the DIY’er you signed up to be.

The relationship challenges you faced in January? Still a risk . The solutions that help improve? Still work…and getting better as I learn alongside you.

Skip to the end for some fun Maddy Hattie reading if you want a laugh at my expense. Then I hope you’ll execute just one piece of advice before Summer is gone- or sign-up for Appairent so we can take care of it for you 🙂 .

Can you do 1 or more of these things? I’d be grateful.

1. Click any of the social icons at the top of this newsletter to repost/share this info on your favorite platform.

2. Forward/refer a friend for the newsletter if you think we can be helpful to their partnership at home.

3. Signup for Appairent Essentials - DIY is possible but you’ve got a lot on. I want one more thing to manage, so you don’t have to.

Pick Your Path: Archive Deep Dive

I've broken down Appairent’s target audience and matched them with the most helpful content for where you might be right now.

The Intention-to-Execution Struggling Professional

You KNOW what you should be doing, but keep getting derailed by work demands

Read This: Your First Job: A Modern Parent's Perspective

This one cuts through the noise about "work-life balance" and gets to the heart of what your actual priorities are. Plus, it includes specific micro-actions you can choose to implement immediately without overhauling your entire schedule.

The System-Seeking Optimizer

You want a clear playbook you can steal and implement this quarter

Read This: What you “should” do

I wrote this when I was just speaking to the husband-dads out there, but it works even better when the whole couple is hearing it. Either/both spouse can use this framework over and over. You can also pick and choose from it. Tactical, usable.

The Overwhelmed Choice-Paralyzed Couple

You want to do something nice but get stuck in endless options

Read This: How More Choices Can WRECK Your Relationship

I revisit the Paradox of Choice so often. Who is with me: I do not need the perfect item, service, consumer good…I just want the shit done for me so I can do what I want to be doing…what I was born to do! This core principle is something I want Appairent to bring to busy couples everywhere. It addresses the sneaky way modern life sabotages good intentions. Includes the "Two-Option Rule" and other practical ways to cut through decision fatigue and actually execute on thoughtful gestures.

The Partnership-First Philosopher

You want deeper thinking about what makes relationships actually work

Read This: Your Most Important Relationship on Earth

When I realized that Appairent works best if “both partners turn their key”, I wrote this and started positioning differently. I’d challenge you (both) to position differently at home, too. Less tactical, more strategic thinking about how to create that "giving contest" dynamic that makes everything else easier.

It isn’t constant connection and woo woo crap - just consistent.

In Need of Hustle and Counterbalance

You're building something big and need to manage intense work periods without destroying your relationship

Read This: You Should TOTALLY lean into work

Work is a real part of our lives. Thus, it’s a real part of our relationships…and sometimes it has to “win”. For when the hustle is real and necessary, but you don't want to sacrifice your marriage in the process. Includes the "Iron Hot Quiz" and practical protocols for supporting each other through intensive periods.

Fireworks: Of Newborns and Holidays (Maddy Hattie)

Newborns are really cute and relatively low effort. That last part is only true if you stop thinking a drinking all nighter (as in baby bottles, not booze unfortunately) is a piece of cake, and if you actually stay at home to enjoy the conveniences your wife has nested her ass off to prepare.

We chose the 4th of July to do none of those things. After about 3.5 hours of sleep I hopped up to “quickly prepare” to ride the 6 miles to Folly Beach for the 4th. I had prepped some pasta salad the night before so the rest would be a breeze, and this is our 2nd kid so I know what I’m doing. Dipshit move.

I spent 2:25 repacking the pasta into more travelable containers, emptying dishwashers, feeding a toddler, reloading pump parts and bottles to the sterilizer, packing said materials when they came out an hour later, consolidating the beach bag full of toys that would not get played with, so that I could mule a 2nd cooler of stored breast milk, and enough toddler snacks to make it beyond the beach ACROSS the freaking Atlantic. Crap…haven’t taken the dog out so I can leave her for 8-14 hours.

Departure!

Target time: 8a.

Actual time: 9a.

ETA quoted by Google Maps- 53 minutes…for 6 miles.

Actual time: 2 hours door to door. 3mph average speed. Nice. The luxury of living very near the beach is NOT on holidays. It’s on a Tuesday afternoon in October. As beach cruiser bicycles passed us on the shoulder, rain clouds built and absolutely pissed rain on the standstill parade of cars headed to the festivity of sand sitting. If only I could have reached the rose in the cooler…

Final result: 4 hours sitting in a cabana by a pool a most gracious friend and host had near the beach…I never saw the sand and I’m ok with that. While I was watching my toddler in the pool who can’t quite swim, I did manage to take an unexpected nap (to be fair I had active parentals playing with him) 😳.

‘Merica 🧨🧨 

Recommitted

America was built on the idea that we can create something better with intention and action. Same goes for your relationship.

Summer's second half is about to fly by. Don't let your most important relationship ride the bench while everything else gets your game time.

🍻

Hat

Want help moving from intention to execution? That's exactly why we built Appairent. Check us out at appairent.com – because your partnership deserves more than good intentions.