Simon Sinek's Real Obsession (He's Right)

Definition & Some Sauce

A relationship is when two people agree to grow together.

I’m paraphrasing, but the author of Find Your Why got stuck in my head recently b/c of his developing work around relationships. He’s currently tuned into friendships specifically, but the root of it is the same as our marriage. He gave me confidence Appairent matters as much as I think it does. B/c when this relationship doesn’t have peace in it, I’m much more likely to uncork and unload everywhere else. No one wants that.

And he also identifies that despite the overwhelming importance and our intentions, these relationships get relegated to fringe time. Fringe time that never comes.

So with that motivation, some feedback from this community and little sleep ( 👶 ), I wanted to bring you an even more actionable newsletter this week.

A hint of perspective, and a multitude of ways and “plays” that you can weave intentional relationship stuff into the busy tapestry the world is weaving around you. This is basically a twist on sharing Appairent’s “sauce” with you to DIY. None of it is rocket science, you just have to…do it (or outsource it to us, that’s why Appairent exists!)

Can you do 1 or more of these things? I’d be grateful.

1. Click any of the social icons at the top of this newsletter to repost/share this info on your favorite platform.

2. Forward/refer a friend for the newsletter if you think we can be helpful to their partnership at home.

3. Signup for Appairent Essentials - DIY is possible but you’ve got a lot on. I want one more thing to manage, so you don’t have to.

TL;DR Digest

Busy, hard-working couples with young kids and big dreams. You don’t have time, that’s why we built Appairent. Here’s a quick grab of insights through our lens, focused on partnerships.

• What We're Seeing: 78% of our couples say they haven't had a real conversation (not logistics) in over a week when they start with us.

• Client Win: Sarah & Mike went from "ships passing in the night" to consistent date nights - we handle the planning, they’ve committed to showing up.

• Reality Check: You wouldn't treat a business partner the way you treat your marriage at times. Use that perspective for good.

EXECUTION PLAYBOOK

Here's how we help our clients show up consistently (not constantly). Steal these tactics DIY’ers.

Words of Affirmation
We send clients pre-written appreciation texts based on what their partner did that week.
DIY version: "I noticed how you handled [specific situation from this week]. That was exactly what we needed."

Acts of Service
We setup time for clients to go deep clean the car seats (or run it to the nearest carwash service).
DIY hack: Calendar this for next Sunday am - grab your coffee and just go knock it out in 25 mins before your spouse is up. You know it’s a win.

Quality Time
We research and book activities within 30 minutes of Appairent couples’ houses for more fractional date “nights”.
DIY option: AllTrails app → 2-mile trail → pick the date/time that’s open now and calendar it like it’s an important pitch meeting (ain’t happening if you don’t).

For our Appairent couples, we handle the research, booking, and reminders. For DIY'ers, now you have the template.

THIS WEEK'S PLAY: AFTERNOON HAPPY HOUR

We plan these for our couples regularly. Here's the playbook play if you want to DIY for a future date. The hardest part is a) to start b) make a choice c) pick a time. Even if this isnt your dream situation, follow the steps to execute and you’ll be happier you did.

📣 @HUSBANDS, this one’s on you to plan (lots of our readers include both partners, so I want to avoid unnecessary good work)

The Setup: A Saturday 4-6 PM, outdoor seating, craft cocktails

Your Tasks: 

1. Block both calendars

2. Book sitter 3:30-6:30 PM

3. Make restaurant reservation

The Text: "Looking forward to sitting across from you Saturday instead of texting logistics."

Why This Works: Afternoon timing = less babysistter demand; 2-hour window = actual connection time; planful = you stop planning for a pitch perfect date night and get a more realistic block of time together.

For our Appairent couples, this just appears on their calendar with all details handled.

THIS WEEK'S VALUE-ADD CHALLENGE

Partner: Block a 1-2 hour window next weekend for you two. Don't plan it yet, just claim the time. Don’t cancel, just show up.

Parent: Let your spouse sleep in Saturday morning. Take the kids somewhere for 2 hours.

Person: Delete one app that steals time from your relationships. (Looking at you, TikTok.)

Pick at least ONE. Execute by next Sunday. We both know you’ll be happier you did.

If you’re already doing things like what you see, that’s awesome. If you’re not, you’re incredibly normal. Without a little nudge, I think about all of the things above, and rarely execute them. If you literally pick any ONE thing in this newsletter and execute on it, you’ll be happier on the other side.

We chose to grow together, so I hope you can find a little bit of practical time for the growing. Godspeed and enjoy another week of Summer (like really enjoy it, don’t just be back here next week wondering what happened)!

🍻 

Hat